The Sound of Geese

About six years ago, I wrote a column about "Marv the Mole Man". He was an elderly gent who helped me get rid of the rodents at my house in Eau Claire. I forwarded his name and phone number to many readers who pleaded for his assistance. To this day, I'm not sure if Marv is still in business, but he was a valuable resource that apparently solved mole problems for many homeowners who subscribed to The Bottom Line.

Now, I need your help.

When I first moved into my new home on a quaint 12-acre pond in the Village of Lake Hallie, I thought the sound of geese in the early morning hours was refreshing. Even though there is vibrant commercial development less than one mile away, I relished in the thought that I lived in the Northwoods, because the sights and sounds made it seem like I was miles away from the Highway 53 Freeway and city life.

Boy, was I wrong. There is nothing more annoying than the sound of geese in the early-morning hours. But, worse yet, the geese and their goslings have found ways to visit my waterfront property. And, to put it mildly, the birds create quite a mess - especially after I mow the lawn and activate the underground sprinkler system. It's like the geese know when the grass is being watered.

I have tried to shoo the birds away by shouting at them, throwing small rocks and even an occasional shot with my BB gun - but to no avail.  I have strung up a yellow rope (I have no idea if geese are color blind), but that will only work for a few days at best.

I have researched the subject of getting rid of geese and was greeted with the subtitle, "There's no goose problem that can't be solved at 325 degrees for five hours ". But I don't care to eat goose. Frankly, it's a bit too greasy for me even if the cook keeps telling me that it tastes like chicken. Plus, federal and state laws protect migratory geese, even if they are a nuisance. So, despite my dislike for the waterfowl species, I have to live with them year-round.

Upon further study, I found various products that are either decoys, alarm systems or a turf treatment that is biodegradable. I suppose I could resort to buying the gimmick items if I knew they would rid the yard of the goose population, but there has to be a better and less expensive way to solve the problem.

So I am asking for advice. I am open to any and all suggestions. And, for those who help me with the geese and need to get rid of moles, I promise to share some of Marv's secret methods.